Calmasutra

How do you keep yourself calm when an overwhelming task lies before you? Last week was a stressful one, and it got me thinking about how I handle these situations. When I was younger, my immediate reaction to stress or unhappiness was a call to my parents. Although sometimes you just need to vent, or know that someone loves you and thinks you’re great, I’ve come to realize that this isn’t a great strategy. While it “works” a lot of the time, I find that this process enables me to wallow and indulge in my emotional state, and even worse, sometimes aggravates my mood when I find that it isn’t magically meliorated by the person on the other end of the phone. What’s more, I often have lingering guilt for having spread my bad cheer to those I love. So, over the years, I’ve been working towards self mood management.

The go-tos that work for most people just don’t seem to work for me. Although I love hot yoga (whenever I get around to it) for my body, I find zero peace of mind in any of the many yoga forms I have tried over the years. I normally can’t have a drink to relax because even one beer or glass of wine renders me more or less useless – I’m not drunk, but I can’t get any work done or perform optimally in a stressful situation. Watch a movie or curl up with a good book? Nah, I’m too distracted and in my own head.  Sometimes I turn to music, but often seek out music that fuels my mood, not necessarily something that makes it better.

So instead, I turn to green tea, time alone at a sushi bar, and a video chat with my niece and nephew. I find the ritual of the first two calming and the latter never fails to make me smile and feel silly. Another thing I’ve come to find super helpful is crossing an unrelated item (something entirely separate from whatever is stressing me out) off my to-do list. This allows me to take my mind off the task at hand when it is driving me crazy, but also feel like I am making progress and creating some order.

So what are your tips? We could all use a little help!